My Blog

Apparently fact and opinion are two different things. I believe that Mrs. Adoree Blair has been victimizing not only Women, but Men as well, and has been considered unfit to be a CFI, by Almost all counties, if not all counties. Look that up! As a reader and not in my position, you are free to express your negative opinion if you'd like. However changes were made in the care of my children and after the courts crappy support, God prevailed. My Sons both know who their father and Mother are. They are also very functioning young Men in the community. One Stays with me full time and the other jointly. Domestic abuse will start being fought harder, and even though he wasn't convicted, it doesn't mean he shouldn't have been. There are many stories of men who weren't convicted of their abusive crimes and then hurt their partner almost killing them or better yet killing them. I will leave it up to you, if you would like to keep your negative ignorant comment on MY Blog please do so. As far as Adoree Blair she has committed a greater injustice to not only this state, but to this states children as well. As a Victim, I have prevailed and will continue to fight against close minded individuals such as yourself, and the abusers; Men or Women at large. Lastly my advise to you Mr. Hot Head....
Do some research and don't judge with your sexual equipment. That's piece is obviously a no brainer...

JJ

Big Lesson Learned....

It is truly amazing to be free. With that being said, an explanation to follow. 

As a good parent, you naturally want what's best for your child, and when someone or something is harming them, you want to rescue them. I fought very hard for my children in court and out. I still fight for my children. I always will, because I love them. That is what a good parent does, no matter what. 

At one point a nobody labeled me. That nobody lied to the courts about me, and guess what!? That just made me an even better Mom. I over came her label. I continued to love my children hard, and make good decisions for them. I still listened to their complaints, and the things I could change I did, and the things I couldn't, worked themselves out.

I learned to overcome my fears and stood up several times to my children's father and my abuser. 

Even though that Nobody lied to the courts and built the other nobody up, he couldn't keep the lie up too long. My children know who their Sperm Doner is, and all I had to do, is sit back and let him be himself. They will soon be able to decide where they want to be, without having a filter/lier on their Father's side. 

Whatever decision they decide to make, I will support them and love them. They know that. I know this, because now they have started to express their love and gratitude. When they need something, they call me. When they have questions they ask me. When they have tough decisions to make, they ask me to work through them with them, and when they don't need me, I take a step back and marvel in the Joy that they are mine. They are living and thriving in my love and the love of their Step Father and siblings. No one will EVER be able to take that away. That pretty picture that was drafted for the Court, was just that. A picture in a delusional mind. The children have gotten the real life experience, and in the end, they know they have always had the same Cheerleader and always will, no one can take that from them.


Research your CFI, know who you are choosing to plan the rest of your Child's life. Many of them have their own agendas. Fortunately for my situation God stepped in and continues to make it right.

JJ

Please Show Your Support!!!!

I apologize for the short notice, but I wanted to let you all know that the Denise Fansua Domestic Violence Foundation (http://denisedv.org) is hosting a Capitol Rally for VAWA this Friday!

If you are interested/able to attend, please meet at the West Steps of the State Capitol Building on Friday, November 16, 2012 at 11:30 AM. Lunch will be provided for all who attend.    

As you all know, we are getting dangerously close to Congress not finishing the Violence Against Women Act. This landmark legislation has been proven to be effective in providing needed support for victims of sexual assault and domestic violence.  We need your help to let Congress know that they need to prioritize finishing the legislation now that the elections are over. This year's Senate version extends protections to the GLBT Community, Native American Community, Immigrants, and now prevents organizations that provide services from discriminating based on sexual orientation.

Visit the Facebook event page for more information about this Capitol Rally and the Denise Fansua Domestic Violence Foundation!

Sincerely,

Amy Miller, MSW

Public Policy Director

Colorado Coalition Against Domestic Violence

1120 Lincoln Street, Suite 900

Denver, CO 80203

Please forward widely!

November 14, 2012

679 Days Since VAWA Expired

183 Days Since Congress’ Last Action on VAWA

30 Days Left to pass VAWA before this Congress ends

Now that the election is over, we must make every effort to get our Representatives and Senators in Congress to reauthorize the Violence Against Women Act (VAWA)!  This is our final opportunity to push for VAWA before this Congress is done.  There is so much at stake and too much to lose – join us in telling Congress: Pass VAWA now!      

National Day of Action:

Today – Wednesday, November 14 – is the National Day of Action to pass VAWA.  Advocates all across the nation will be contacting their elected officials to tell them “Pass VAWA now!”

Please take a few minutes tomorrow to call your Senators and Representatives.

·         Use this number 888.269.5702 to connect to the Capitol switchboard.  Then ask to be connected to your U.S. Representative (www.house.gov) or Senator (www.senate.gov).  
·         Tell them:  “I am your constituent.  Now that the elections are over, I urge you to reauthorize the Violence Against Women Act (VAWA)!  It has been 679 days since VAWA expired, and 183 days since Congress’s last action on VAWA.  Please, show women and victims that you care – pass VAWA now!” 

Email: Don’t have time to call? You can also email the short message above to your Members of Congress. 

Twitter:  Do you tweet?  Here are a few sample tweets that you can use! 

@[INSERT YOUR REP’S TWITTER HANDLE] #PassVAWA2012 because victims need safe and affordable housing #dv #VAWA

@[INSERT YOUR REP’S TWITTER HANDLE] #PassVAWA2012 because victims are still being killed by their partners. #dv #VAWA

@[INSERT YOUR REP’S TWIITER HANDLE] #PassVAWA2012 because our shelter serves victims in your community who depend on it!

Social Media

Be a part of a ground-breaking campaign to leverage the full power of social media in fighting for theReauthorization of VAWA! Join advocates across the nation in the #PassVAWA2012 Facebook Photo Campaign to tell Congress that it’s time to reauthorize the Violence Against Women Act!  It’s easy – just snap photos of you, your friends, and your colleagues holding up signs saying why we need to Pass VAWA NOW! Submit your photos via email to advocacy@nnedv.org and lccref@gmail.com or tweetpic to #PassVAWA2012.

The Background

You have worked so hard over the past two years to urge Congress to reauthorize VAWA.  Election cycle politics derailed VAWA’s passage and now we have a final opportunity to get this done!  Congress needs to hear from you that this is still a priority and that they need to act in the “lame duck” session.  With the combination of additional pressure from you throughout November and the work of NNEDV and others at the national level, we believe that it is very likely that Congress will act on VAWA before the end of this session. 

Thanks you for all that you do!

The Policy Team

Monica McLaughlin

Senior Public Policy Specialist

National Network to End Domestic Violence

mmclaughlin@nnedv.org

Main office: 202.543.5566

www.nnedv.org

Thank you for your extraordinary advocacy around VAWA’s reauthorization and your work to defeat H.R. 4970, a bill that moves backward on VAWA reauthorization.  Although the bill passed in the House (222 to 205) it was a divided and very close vote.  This close vote will help to strengthen the voice of victims when the House and Senate bills are reconciled in the conference process and we will continue to work hard to get a VAWA that moves forward. 

Our work is not done!  Now we must thank those who stood for and with victims of violence and express our disappointment in those who did not and voted to weaken VAWA.  We can look forward to the conference process, where we can push to ensure that the vote will more closely reflect the Senate passed S. 1925.  Please take the following actions – we have to keep the pressure up to get the best law for victims!

ACTION 1:  THANK REPRESENTATIVES WHO VOTED AGAINST H.R. 4970

Now we need to thank Representatives who voted against H.R. 4970.  Please call these Representatives and say, “Thank you for listening to the needs of victims and for voting against H.R. 4970.  We look forward to your continued leadership as VAWA is addressed in the conference process.” 

Click this link to find those who voted “NO”  http://clerk.house.gov/evs/2012/roll258.xml#N.  To find your Representative, click herehttp://www.house.gov/representatives/find/.  Use the Capitol Switchboard to be connected with your Representative’s office (202) 224-3121. 

ACTION 2:  EXPRESS YOUR DISAPPOINTMENT TO REPRESENTATIVES WHO VOTED YES ON H.R. 4970

Find out if your Representative voted for the flawed H.R.4970 through this link http://clerk.house.gov/evs/2012/roll258.xml#Y (an “AYE” vote is a yes on H.R. 4970).  To find your Representative, click here http://www.house.gov/representatives/find/.  Use the Capitol Switchboard to find your Representative’s phone number – (202) 224-3121.

Please call your Representative and say, “I am disappointed in his/her vote on H.R. 4970, a bill that moves backward on VAWA because it rolls back long-standing protections and does not meet the urgent needs of many victims.  We urge him/her to support a bipartisan bill that mirrors the Senate passed S. 1925 as the bill moves forward.”  

You can also modify and send this Letter to the Editor.  This letter is designed for individuals and organizations who voiced their concerns with H.R. 4970 and were disappointed in their Representative’s vote. 

Listen to victims – move forward on VAWA

I am writing to express my extreme disappointment in the passage of H.R. 4970 in the U.S. House of Representatives.  I called my Representative, XX and urged her/him to vote against this bill which rolls back protections for victims and does not meet the urgent needs of many victims.  Not only did my Representative not listen to me, he/she did not listen to any of the thousands of organizations and individuals engaged in the work to end violence against women who urged them to vote against the bill.  Many Representatives claimed that the provisions in the Senate bill were included to make this a political fight.  As a victim advocate, I have no interest in such a fight.  I just want to ensure that all victims are protected from abuse and that perpetrators are held accountable.  And make no mistake, H.R. 4970 is not a bill that is supported by my organization and it does not address many of the most pressing needs of victims

The House had the opportunity but failed to take up the bipartisan Senate bill that enjoyed the support of thousands of victim-centered organizations working to end domestic and sexual violence.  We urge the House and the Senate to come together to pass a bipartisan bill that builds upon VAWA’s strengths, moves the legislation forward and meets the urgent needs of victims. Victims need VAWA to pass – with protections and services for all!

Monica McLaughlin

Senior Public Policy Specialist

National Network to End Domestic Violence

mmclaughlin@nnedv.org

Cell: 202.251.2191

Main office: 202.543.5566

www.nnedv.org

TELL YOUR REPRESENTATIVE TO VOTE NO ON (H.R. 4970) – it STILL weakens the Violence Against Women Act!

While H.R. 4970 will be amended before a vote tomorrow, it STILL rolls back protections and is harmful for victims.  We must tell our Representatives that we strongly oppose this bill.  The vote could be as early as tomorrow, so now is the time for Representatives to hear from you.  If you have called before, please call again to ensure that your Representative knows that H.R. 4970 STILL harms victims. 

ACTION 1:  CALL EACH U.S. REPRESENTATIVE AND TELL THEM THAT H.R. 4970 STILL HARMS VICTIMS

Message: “H.R. 4970 STILL HARMS victims of violence.  We oppose H.R. 4970, even as amended, because it rolls back protections for victims and does not address the needs of all victims. We support a bill like the bipartisan Senate bill that protects Native victims, immigrant victims, LGBT victims and other marginalized communities.  The House must must support ALL victims.” Use the Capital switchboard number (202) 224-3121 to be connected.

H.R. 4970 moves VAWA backward – please read and share this New York Times Op Ed -  http://www.nytimes.com/2012/05/14/opinion/backward-on-domestic-violence.html?partner=rssnyt&emc=rss

Mental Health Specialist Gone MENTAL.....

For those females that have no children and bully the children of their mates, that is also abuse or Domestic Violence......


A Mental health specialist should be able to identify someone with these traits or characteristics very easily......
Unless it is not their intent to care for the child, but to cover up for the battering parent. Why do you do it??? Is it Money? Is it Power over the abused?? Are you a batterer too??


Yes you are. You use your power of the system and hide behind your title to batter the stronger person. For your info, if that person is truly strong and has had enough, you might as well kick rocks. I AM NOT AFRAID. The previous blog holds strong.


I am taking a stand for every Mother you have bullied, made false allegations about. Cheated out of the right outcome and on top of that destroyed the family and values that those Mother's children could have had, had they have not trusted you as their cfi, your not even worth the capitol letters......


You are not worth the dirt under my fingernails.....


Ladies and Gentlemen hold your head high and fight for your children. YOU are their ONLY Advocate, don't let anyone fool you into thinking, they have the best interest in your children. When MONEY comes into play, your children are just another commodity. 


Parents know their children's worth, and unfortunately batterers know how to pull the true parent down, With their children. SAD, but it can change, look at the last couple of blogs, WE can make a change, by NOT BEING AFRAID.


CONTINUE TO ADVOCATE FOR YOUR CHILDREN, YOU ARE TRULY THE ONLY ONE WHO CARES.........


JJ

Progress for Efforts!!

Dear Fellow Coloradan,

I am proud to announce that last week the Senate passed the Violence Against Women Reauthorization Act (VAWA). The bill now moves to the U.S. House of Representatives, where – despite receiving broad bipartisan support in the Senate – it faces an uphill battle.

Especially in an election year, even common-sense legislation like VAWA is at risk of turning into a political chess piece. That's why I'm calling on my colleagues in the House not to allow this truly bipartisan legislation to be compromised by partisan games.

You can show your support for VAWA by signing my petition: http://markudall.senate.gov/vawa.

VAWA is an important tool to fight back against domestic violence, sexual assault, stalking and other crimes that affect the entire community. For the past 18 years, VAWA has supported critical services for victims and survivors, and provided our law enforcement beefed-up resources and tools for catching and prosecuting perpetrators of violent crimes against women.

VAWA has been instrumental in making a difference in the lives of millions of women, children – and yes, men too – across our country, changing the way we think about and respond to domestic violence. In 2010 alone, 60,000 survivors of domestic violence in Colorado contacted state crisis hotlines seeking help – a staggering number that reinforces the urgency of reauthorizing VAWA.

Thank you for all of your support in helping me pass this important bill in the Senate. I hope you will stay involved as the bill is considered in the House.

Warm regards,

I'm not afraid (I'm not afraid)
To take a stand (to take a stand)
Everybody (everybody)
Come take my hand (come take my hand)
We'll walk this road together, through the storm
Whatever weather, cold or warm
Just letting you know that, you're not alone
Holla if you feel like you've been down the same road (same road)
Chorus by Eminem, I'm not afraid


Don't be afraid to stand up and fight, for those you love, especially your children. You carried them, had them and raise them on a day to day basis. Fight for your rights and theirs, till the end.......


JJ 

Sometimes When You Win......

Sometimes when you loose, you really Win. When you win, you really Loose. Keep fighting for Yourself and your Kids. In the end Your Children will know who fought for them and truly cared for them. Your prize is knowing that you did all you could. In the bigger spectrum, hopefully there will be one less batterer, or criminal in the world. I am a proud Mother and Non-battered Wife. I do all I can to make my Children happy and successful. When I reach those pearly gates, I can look God in the eye and say, I did all I could has a Mother, and a parent. You may have lost a Court Case, but you've Won a battle or 50 for your Child(ren). Keep up the great work! I know I will......




JJ

Keeping It Real

A Woman is the most important part of an 


equation. Without us, Nothing would be born, 


cared for, nurtured, organized, or kept up. Only a 


real man knows a real woman's worth, and the 


meaning they put in the lives of all! 


Just sayin......


All things are possible with God!!




JJ

I Will Survive

Apologies for Lack of Words..........


I am now the Mother of a baby girl, and she is Amazing :)


The best part, is that she will grow up to watch a stable relationship full of love. That makes me happy. It is attainable after all you have been through, you just have to let it!


A little inspiration from A Music Group called Destiny's Child/Survivor~


I'm Wishing you the best, Pray that you are blessed, bring much success, no stress, and lots of happiness, I'm not gon blast you on the radio, I'm not gon lie on you and your family No! I'm not gon hate on you in the magazines, I'm not gon compromise my Christianity, U know I'm not gon dis you on the internet, Cause my Mama taught me better than that! I'm a Survivor, I'm not gon give up, I'm not gon stop, Imma work harder, I'm a survivor I'm gonna make it, I will survive, and keep on surviving! 


Keep on Surviving, the reward is too great to stop now!


Till next time,


JJ

I Am a Woman

You know.........


It is so hard living life after being battered, and having to raise kids with that batterer. In reality you are raising the children and he is just making, the already  tough job of raising a child even harder. However I am a Women, and so I do it. No one can do it like me. He can never take away the fact that. I worked doubly hard to raise stable, well mannered, well educated children. He may be late bringing them, but I always make sure they are on time. He may not pay, but they will always have the things that they need. He may break them, but I will always fix them, and do you want to know why?? It's because I AM A WOMAN. Something I am so proud of, something I am so great at. Something he can never put down because HE is a BOY. He will Never have the strength I have, he will never take away my drive and he will never take away the beauty of ME being a Woman.


So when your miserable batterer makes you upset, tries to take away your shine. Tries to tell you. you're not good enough, or even tries to take your Victory........


You just remember one thing; a Woman never gives up on her children, She may be beat, put down, or stalked, but the one thing a Woman will do is forever protect and love her children. No matter what she will keep them safe.


I have a beautiful home, not because of the material items, but for the laughter, the constant chatter, even though I ask for silence, the ability to teach what love is and to receive love when it is given back. I am loved by a Man, and I have boundaries, I am able to be myself and love fully, and in return he can as well have those same rights. My home has constructive arguments, without tension/or yelling! 


Again, I am free to be Me.......


So when your batterer feels the need to put you down, start a problem, hurt your children. Lie in court and make them believe him. Just remember he is only as big as you let him be in your life, You have the capability to rehabilitate your children, and you don't have to give up in court. You know why??


You are a WOMAN...


No one can ever take that from you, and if you feel down and out because of something your batterer has done to you, think about all the wonderful things you have done, as a Woman without him in your life, all the things you wouldn't have been able to do if you would have stayed, and all the fighting you can still do, to get your life back....


I Just did, and looks like I got a whole lot of fighting to do. Why don't you join me. Man, Woman, or Child, we all have a story. One thing that cannot be taken from us, is the happiness we refuse to let go of.


I refuse to let my abuser, take my God given right to just be, you know why???


I AM A WOMAN ;0)




JJ 

Legislative Meetings for the Colorado Coalition Against Domestic Violence

This Thursday and Friday were two very productive days!! On Thursday, the first day of conference I learned a great deal about Legislative bill HB 1080. This bill would allow the domestically abused, male and female victims to keep their address undisclosed for four years and allow those to stay in hiding and renew via email and not through an application assistant. At this time Victims must seek out an application assistant to renew their application, and there are very few per County. This could cause delay in renewal and would put a Victim at higher risk of being found by their batterer. We then had a small break and then lunch with some of the legislators or legislative representatives. Lunch was a huge success I believe. It was very nice to meet The Assistant for Representative Conti. We had a very extensive conversation on Domestic violence and my experience in dealing with a CFI. I informed her of my trials and tribulations and expressed much of my concern for the future of our children. It was amazing to see her concern for the topic grow. I am looking forward to hearing from the Representatives office, and hope to help better Colorado in the near future. We ended the day off with Legislative Training given by Colorado Speaker of the House Terrance D. Carroll. He was an amazing speaker, and very down to earth. Mr. Carroll gave advise and answered questions about how to speak and relate to legislators, and did a fantastic job!


Friday Started out with breakfast with Representative Nancy Todd, a dynamic Woman and a strong supporter against Domestic Violence. I enjoyed listening to her speak and her personal insight on the topic of Domestic Violence. I would like to give a personal and very warm Thank you to Representative Todd for all of her hard work and dedication to a very important cause!!


After breakfast we all walked to the State Capitol to talk to the Legislation individually about HB 1080, and also to advocate more supporters for the Domestic Violence Fight! I was assigned Senator Nance Spence. I was very nervous to speak with Senator Spence, but like Representative Todd, I found her to be quite Dynamic! I was able to speak to her about HB 1080, and also about funding for Domestic Violence programs, and my concern about CFI's in Colorado. She was very receptive to all I said and even said she would vote yes on HB 1080, after reading the full bill. She also addressed my concern for the lack of accountability CFI's have in Colorado, and has started an investigation in Arapahoe County. Senator Spence is a very warm and intelligent Woman. She is very aware of the problems our children face within the court system and has taken initiative to help stop the problem. I Thank you Senator Spence for your time speaking with me and listening to my concerns.


I will continue to advocate against Domestic Violence and feel very hopeful at this time for the future. I have never felt so happy about facing a challenge head on, than I do today. Please leave your stories or comments on this blog. You never know, Legislation may hear your voice as well.......


JJ

Answers, If You Can Help Do!!

It appears we have been heard, now we need to press the State Court Administrator's Office (SCAO)  DORA & our Legislators for implementation to avoid the same fate of the 2002 Report which wasn't, causing more children to be harmed.

 

http://www.courts.state.co.us/Courts/Supreme_Court/Committees/Committee.cfm/Committee_ID/25    Scroll down on the site to access the report. 

Recommendation #1:  Limit the Scope of the Order of Appointment, change the Chief Justice Directives by:

• Establishing a cap either on number of hours or total cost, without further order;
• Limiting psychological testing to a qualified professional who is not the CFI and upon court order; and
• Establishing decision points to consider prior to an appointment or establishing a requirement for the court to enter a finding prior to an appointment.

Recommendation #2:  Centralize and Clarify Complaint Process, change the Chief Justice Directives by:

• Establishing a statewide complaint investigation protocol for districts that includes timeframes and outcomes reporting;
• Establishing a standard information form for parties as to their rights and responsibilities, responsibilities of the CFI, and complaint process;
• Establishing centralized complaint form and submission;
• Setting forth contents of CFI file and requirements/timeframes for disclosure of file;
• Standardizing CFI billing protocol and format;
• Standardizing CFI report format;
• Providing graduated sanctions for CFI misconduct or violation of standards; and
• Establishing timeframes for filing CFI reports, objections and/or supplemental information.

Change the Statutes by:

• Provide clarification to DORA's authority to review complaints pertaining to the CO Mental Health Practice Act.  [Need all families support with their Legislators, SCAO, & DORA contacts below to push for elimination of the quasi-judicial immunity Statute 12-43-215-(7)]

Recommendation #3:  Standardize the Qualification Process, change the Chief Justice Directives by:

• Requiring that SCAO performs criminal background checks for all CFIs except for CO licensed attorney-CFIs and identifies associated disqualifying factors;
• Establishing that a CFI has an affirmative duty to report any violations related to the disqualifying factors;
• Requiring that CFI attends SCAO approved/provided training;
• Establishing that SCAO verifies training completion and continuing education requirements; and
• Establishing a CFI mentoring program.

Recommendation #4:  Maintain a List of Qualified CFIs, change the Chief Justice Directives by:

• Establishing a statewide list of qualified CFIs for districts to appoint CFIs.

Recommendation #5:  Formal Adoption of PC Standards

Committee recommends adoption of the Standards set forth in the Standing Committee White Paper titled Court Appointments of Parenting Coordinators:  A Resource for Courts and Professionals, in addition to the identification and implementation of a statewide policy that addresses such things as qualifications, fees, training and complaint process.

 

Recommendation #6:  Modify Chief Justice Directives consistent with Recommendations.  The Standing Committee on Family Issues will establish task groups to implement recommendations.  The subcommitee should be multi-disciplinary and include rural and urban representatives.  [This is our chance to get directly on the committees and press the State Court Administrator's Office to ensure the Recommendations are implemented]

 

Legislators - http://www.leg.state.co.us, click on Contact Information.  Tips for maximum impact on legislators:  Be brief, be polite, include a few reasons, and contact info.  If you don't know who your legislator is - http://www.votesmart.org/index.htm.

 

Chad Edinger, Court Auxiliary Services Coordinator                               

Colorado State Court Administrator's Office

Ph: 303-837-3605

chad.edinger@judicial.state.co.us

Bill DeLisio, Family Law Program Manager

Colorado State Court Administrator's Office

Ph: 303-837-3623

bill.delisio@judicial.state.co.us

Bryan Jameson, Policy Analyst

DORA - Executive Director's Office, Office of Policy, Research & Regulatory Reform
Ph: 303.894.7833

Bryan.Jameson@dora.state.co.us

Saul Larsen, Policy Analyst

DORA - Executive Director's Office. Office of Policy, Research & Regulatory Reform
Ph: 303.894.7833

Saul.Larsen@dora.state.co.us

 

We need to begin work with our legislators as the session begins 1/12, including thoroughly scrutinizing any family court or court appointed expert related bills introduced.    http://www.leg.state.co.us/, click on Status and Calendar.  Legislative season ends May 2011.

We need your support please to push these Recommendations through and close the gaps that led to the abuses of the system that so many of us have experienced, resulting in harm to our children.  Please distribute widely.

United for Change,

Moms4ChangeNow@gmail.com
 

I Have Been Answered.....But Still Stuck

After the Letter, I did get  response right away. Mr. Edinger referred me to Amy Miller who is Public Policy Director. She gave me some referrals in which I have used before, but at the same rate the abuse by my ex continues. Ultimately Court is the answer and after a terrible experience like that, who wants to go back!? However, I will be registered to share my story with Legislation by Friday. I will not be intimidated!! I will name drop and tell them why this system should change! I will go back to court as well, However very prepared.......


I will tell you how it goes!


JJ 

Fighting and Looking for Results-My Letter to Court Auxiliary Services Coordinator Colorado State Court Administrator's Office

Hello Mr. Edinger, 

We spoke about a month and a half ago, and I had just lost my case to my Ex due to a bad CFI. Now life for me has gotten worse and worse. My Ex husband has changed the schedule whenever he deems necessary,  and then demands for me to pick up the children or alter my schedule to go with his unauthorized changes. If I do not comply, he threatens to take me to court. I am scared to go back to court due to my previous experiences, but do not know what else to do. One of my children has a learning disability and has a court appointed counselor to deem when he is ready to go to his Father's home full time. She has not authorized any additional time with the exception of one overnight and one dinner night. Since then My Son has gotten in trouble at school 3 times and behavior has changed dramatically. Without authorization of the counselor my ex has added an extra day, this weekend. I consulted my Son's counselor and she said she did not authorize the change and was just discussing some changes with my son Eric. She gave My ex a call to explain and to also re schedule the appointment with our Son he had missed and he never called her back. However he implemented the change on his own. After implementing the change, he is refusing to bring the children home. I am sick with the flu and I asked him to bring the children home, he refused. So I told him to make sure to have the children to school on time tomorrow. Now he has done nothing but harass me and send many text messages threatening to take me back to court. I have gone above and beyond to adhere to the schedule the court gave and now, anytime he wishes he changes it, threatening to take me back to court. I cannot live this way any longer Mr Edinger. I am being battered, over and over again, and the system has allowed this. How do I fight back?? How do I put this abuse on my children and myself to a stop? Please any suggestions.

Thanks,

It's Amazing, Think About This.....

It's Amazing, you endure the physical and the emotional abuse from your batterer and you wonder...


What did I do to deserve this, and finally you figure out you did nothing and it's all him. He is one warped twisted individual, and now his life's goal is to make your life a living hell. So you leave, but you have his Children. Since you are struggling he leaves you with the children alone without any support. 


Then you begin to have support and he wants to enter the children's lives just to mess yours up. You go to court, the court allows the battering to continue, by allowing a CFI to lie, you not to prove your case and then on top of that tell the batterer he's forgiven after putting you down as a mother. It's disgusting!


 Now My batterer seems to think it's okay to throw that day in my face every chance he gets. When things don't go his way, which generally means I am not going above and beyond to make him happy, he threatens court again. Well you know what I am fed up!!!!! Take my tail back to court then. I am no longer your victim and I am going to live my life. I deserve my time with my children as you do your time. 


However I will not be frightened of the court system and allow my batterer to continue to batter me!!!


If you don't want to bring the children home on time, then keep them another day. I am not going to stop what I am doing and come and get them because you changed the schedule around. I am worthy of a life outside of our children, and I no longer have any connection with you!! I will hold my end of the parenting plan and if you cannot hold yours up then, give them to me and when you can come get them on your parenting time let me know. No more will I cater to your schedule, give you extra time, or put up with your excuses. It's not my job!! 


Time to step up Ladies!! YOU DO NOT HAVE TO BE THE VICTIM. Call their bluff from time to time, stop being scared.


It's a learning process, I am still learning too. One step at a time. One No at a time. One I am worth it at a time. Believe me, we as women are worth it. When things are broken who has to fix it?? We do. So whether we fix it while being a victim or while loving ourselves, We are much more supportive after loving our selves. This Crap has  to end sometime. 


Think About It!!!!


Aren't You Ready Yet?????